Kadie's Miraculous Adventures in Mancunt
by wankbait4camels
Summary: Rated M for fairly good reasons.
1. The Beginning

"Nuclear submarines," Marshall said, a lustful hint resonating in his thick British accent, "I want to have them shoved so far up my arse that I could sail to Mongolia." He had a look of longing deep set within his dark and mysterious eyes.

"Mongolia isn't even on the coast you little British cunt,"Kadie retorted whilst applying more lube to her 4 foot long cow dick, created by generations of Texan-style inbreeding and genetic deformation.

"Exactly," Marshall said, drawing out the word long enough that it would be able to match the enviable length of Kadie's magnificent well lubed cock.

Kadie had decided to punish Marshall after what he had said about how her finely trimmed 'stache made her look like a certain someone whose name rhymed with Kadolf Schmitler. She had bent him over and took a liking to smacking his mighty buttock flesh, causing a thunderous explosion of expletives and Trump electoral speeches to spew forth from the fat British cunt's mouth, and with every successive impact causing his chin's chins to wobble. Kadie then readied herself into position, hooves and legs wrapped round the man-child's waist, and told Marshall to open wide.

"Ahhhhhhh- ARGGGHH JESUS CHRIS HELP ME!" He screamed as Kadie rammed a fist into his tight, virgin mancunt. "MY ARSE FEELS LIKE A YAWNING HIPPO!" He roared, spewing more and more electoral speeches, exclaiming at one point that he could #FeelTheBern.

Marshall, at this point, realised that he had clearly opened up the wrong hole. He bit down on his tongue, causing a slight trickle of blood and the metallic taste to fill his mouth. Kadie began to pump her fist, slowly at first, forward and backward in strong, powerful strokes. It was warm, and her fist was well lubed from all those pigs the filthy redneck had fisted earlier, even further still by the brown sludge that had occupied his colon, and so she slid in and out of his tight puckered hole with ease. However, she knew that this was by far not enough, and out of the corner of her eye, she saw something; a glass bottle.

With this, she achieved a zen like bout of true enlightenment. She seized the bottle and then smashed it over Marshall's mighty slabs of white buttock meat, decorating the pale flesh with faint, glimmering glass shards. Howling, he erupted with more and more quotes from the Republicans about the legitimacy of Obama's U.S. birth certificate and Kadie retrieved her monstrous hand from Marshall's mancunt, and stuck the shards of glass in between her knuckles. Returning back to the fisting, this time plunging even deeper into his colon's furthest reaches, the glass-inlaid fist created several severe lacerations that ran the length of his rectal passage, tearing his colon into small pink ribbons. The blood made her hand slick and wet, mixing with the sludge that had leaked out from his gaping hole, and she was getting really horny over this.

She reached down deep into her gay pride parade themed shorts, and grabbed the pre-lubed, well polished behemoth of a cock and began running her finger along the tip of her spear, gently advertising a thin trail of precum to emerge from its end. By this time, Marshall was unconscious and was heavily bleeding, and Kadie, knowing her time with him in this world shouldn't be wasted, decided to not let the precious red lubricant go to waste. She quickly rammed her cock inside of him, rupturing and tearing his intestines apart, practically cleaving his body asunder.

"Right. Now to fuck him whilst he's still warm," she whispered to herself as she slammed her cock in and out of his soft boypussy, at points so deep in him she may as well as have been fucking his brains out. The involuntarily twitches from his lifeless husk of a body brought Kadie ever closer to orgasm. As she felt his sphincter contract and tighten rhythmically around her cock, she began to speed up her thrusts, well and truly bringing her past the edge.

She began pumping thick, creamy cum into his mancunt, and with each and every thrust her moans could be heard throughout the entire apartment building. Her body began to overload with all the pleasure wrought from his body, and she passed out unconscious, in a pool of red, bloodied cum diluted with shit, still dripping from Marshall's sweet delectable rear, forming a small puddle at the base of the unconscious pair.


	2. Prison

_Sirens. Flashes of light. Haze. Blood. Beeping of... of something._

" _Is he going to pull through?" A concerned voice asked._

" _He's in a critical condition." Another replied_

 _Beep... Beep... Beep..._

" _Is he going to pull through?" The first asked, getting more and more worried._

 _Beep... Beep... Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep_

 _Footsteps. A stampede. Darkness._

 _Then, a light._

 _Alluring, beautiful._

 _I fight it. I let the darkness swallow me._

 _Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep... Beep... Beep..._

* * *

"In the case of the rape and murder of an upstanding meme-ber, Marshall ' Shrekcosby', the defendant is found:"

 **"GUILTY!"** Said the judge. "You will spend 17 years behind bars at one of our prisons especially developed to hold people like you."

That was the day Kadie's life died before her eyes.

* * *

Prison: Something Kadie was not prepared for, nor did she ask for, but it was going to happen anyway.

Convenient that prison was equatable to rape.

Kadie was naturally big, what with being half-cow and all, but she was dwarfed by everyone in prison. And the worst part was she was the shower bitch. She was passed around so much it reminded her of her childhood with her uncles. They turned her tiny arsehole into something that could probably fit a baseball bat in. The prison guards didn't help either, they just joined in.

One guard, called Elfie kept screaming at her, calling her a filthy sand nigger and just used her as a sex toy. Elfie was huge, with 16 inch dick that was as thick as her palm. It hurt Kadie so much, and the only way she could keep going was by telling herself that it was karma. So she decided to make herself stronger, faster, smarter, so she could fight back and protect whatever's left of her tattered anus.

She decided to fight back against another shower rapist, and ended up nearly killing the bitch. It took nearly two days for the janitors to clean up all of the fluids that had stained the tiles. This got Elfie permanently assigned to her.

She formulated a plan that would get her a way out. She stole an issue of the critically acclaimed magazine 'Filthy Sand Niggers Fucking White People With Fat Rolls on Their Fat Rolls' and left it outside of Elfie's office. When Elfie examined the magazine, she tore away most of her clothes and all of her equipment and began thumping her chest and masturbating furiously. This, Kadie decided, was the perfect time to strike.

She leapt out of her hiding spot and got herself into a position so that she could lunge fist-first deep into Elfie's arsehole. Elfie's hoots of pleasure, joy, and masturbation became howls of pain, begging and rectal bleeding. The howls became screeches as Kadie's cock slammed deep into Elfie's tight nubile young body.

Elfie screamed. Elfie cried. Elfie yelled. Elfie begged for help to come. But only Kadie had come. Kadie had come.

Kadie began to pump her seed deep into Elfie. Elfie yelled more as Kadie's sticky fluid leaked out of Elfie's lacerated anus. Kadie knew Elfie wouldn't stay quiet on her own, so she pulled out and stuffed her cock into Elfie's mouth. Elfie's screams and yells became less frequent and weaker, and eventually stopped altogether.

Kadie clawed at Elfie's keys, and ran, ran far away, to a land where I can seek retribution and a new life.

Mexico.


	3. Mexico

KMAiM Chapter 3 – Mexico

Sombreros. Everywhere. Kadie was starting to begin regretting her decision to run away to Mexico. But she knew there was no way that she was getting back into Trump Land, especially since he closed off the borders and begun construction of the wall. The dust and sand stung her eyes as the wind blew, causing her to cover her eyes almost constantly. Because of this, she had no clue as to where she was going.

As such, she accidentally walked into a very large muscular walrus-of-a-man, going by the name of Suga. Now Suga was not very happy with being disturbed by this strange half-cow, half-amorphis-mass-of-blubber, and since he hadn't eaten yet whilst he was focusing on hauling some of the many suspicious packages that had very peculiar labels on, he decided to have a lovely delicious hamburger that may or may not have been Kadie's rear end. Immediately, he parked himself under her legs, then pulled her down so her arse was resting atop his face, her arsehole directly above her mouth. What he didn't consider was that Kadie had a terrible case of flatulence after eating one of the integral pieces of Mexican cuisine; the burrito. And burrito-induced flatulence was one of the main cause of Mexican and Jewish deaths, especially between the years of 1939 and 1945, meaning Suga was doomed to inhale a poisonous gas.

Suga immediately died due to the inhalation of gas. Kadie saw this, and immediately saw the opportunity that awaited her in his rectal cavity. Penetration was something her cock had been lusting after for what felt like an eternity. It was broad daylight, but she was also in the middle of a dusty road that was rarely ever used, hence the reason both Suga and Kadie were using it. She decided to stick her mighty, long hard cock inside of his tight mancunt.

It felt so amazingly tight, but because of how long it had been, she felt that her huge throbbing cock needed extra stimulation. So she quickly pulled out, then stuck her dick in a cactus. The sting and the burn was intense and exciting. She fucked the cactus right out of its roots and decided to tear it apart, and stuff it deep into Suga's anus. She proceeded to fuck the shit out of it.

This orgasm was one of the most intense she had felt yet. Her splooge splattered everywhere. Her eyes rolled back. She collapsed unconscious, dick bared to the rest of the world.


End file.
